November 12, 2007

Festivus for the Rest of Us

And today makes 3 days in a row. Apparently I'm trying to catch up to Christie...

I was just commenting to my friend Gretchen how positive she is, and she confessed that her dad called her Pollyanna with a glad complex. In that spirit, I was going to list some of my favorite things, but realized it would take too much time to do them justice. So, instead, I will air some of my Festivus Grievances(Miss you Josh and Jessi).

  1. Being sticky. Last night, I was tired of scolding Calvin, so as his punishment I took him out to Cold Stones(huh?). He licked some ice cream off the table. I did not freak out, though I did reach for some baby wipes...which were left at home with Ollie. We were sticky and it felt icky.

  2. Blumps in my food. As a kid, butter blumps on my toast or in my malt-o-meal. This morning? Apple bits in my oatmeal that I picked out one-by-one. Raisins are by far the worst offenders, with the exception of Natasha's cookies. Oh and mayo blobs from Subway
  3. Making a right-hand turn on R-dale Hwy, being stuck behind that one car who is determined to go straight
  4. Mysterious pee smell. Just after Ollie's birth, Ally and Lorie came by. After they left, I discovered the bathroom had a stench of urine. Mortified, I remembered Lorie using the bathroom twice(she was still pregnant). It all started when Finn learned to pee "stand-up style". After scouring the bowl and floor and changing the trash, the smell was STILL THERE! Finally, I discovered that the shower curtain was the culprit(two days in a row), so bye-bye shower curtain. I'm only comforted by the fact that Lorie will someday understand when Henry learns to go "stand-up style". Oh, and for moms of boys, buy stock and trade in the product "Urine Gone". It works miracles on floors.

  5. Use of the word "Colleague". It sounds much too mucky-muck and pretentious.

  6. Running out of bobbin thread right in the middle of a tricky maneuver.

  7. No nursing corner at church. With our bazillion babies you'd think we'd have one wee corner. John set up a chair for me once(or twice)and a man sat in it. Sheesh.

  8. Internet shipping charges. With the outrageous cost of gas, I don't know why I feel so entitled to free shipping. Almost makes me want to shop at our ghetto mall.
  9. The feel -of dry cotton balls on my skins bothers me altogether.

  10. The look -John gives me when I'm in cyberspace too long. You know the look. Like you're an alcoholic caught drinking.

  11. People who go on and on...Wait that's me.

Well, at least I discovered 2 of my favorite wipes and Urine Gone.

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