silence

Hello dear blog friends,

Lent is coming soon. March 9th.

Last year I gave up blogging for 40 days.

This time, I thought I'd try something different.

For 40 days, I plan on blogging with the comments section disabled.

Yep. Blogging in silence, with no comments.

Why?

To be completely honest, it's partly because the nature of blogging is starting to confuse me and this is the only way I know how to respond at the present time.

A few days ago, A girl I never met, yet deeply respect, wrote a blog post, that sent ripples though blog land. It definitely gave me something to think about regarding the nature of blogging that I have never even thought about.

And now she is walking away from blogging. I really like this girl and think she's 'spot on' regarding certain negative aspects of blogging. I wish my blog was immune to these things...but I think it would be unwise for me to assume that I cannot be effected. After all, I do not blog in a bubble of isolation!

I do not plan to pack up my little band of brothers and leave the blog world just yet.

But, I do want to think more and make sure I'm blogging for the right reasons.

I really want to hear God's voice more clearly. So I am turning off the comments section to free my mind from distractions. To know in my heart that as I blog, I am not trying to seek approval from others. I sincerely want to live my life in the hopes of pleasing God and bringing him the glory. And this is the only way I know how to do that for now.

I do not think that the 'comment section' is wrong. A lot of time, it can uplift the downtrodden or celebrate a happy occasion. Other times, it's just plain old fashioned fun. No harm in that. Obviously it depends entirely on your heart's motive when publishing a post.

For example, here are some things I am pondering of late.

1)Say I came up with a fabulous new craft idea and wanted to share it on my blog. Am I sincerely sharing it for the benefit of others? Or do I subconsciously want to gain praise and make a name for myself? Bleh. That does not sound delightful. That's not what I want. At least, I don't want to want that.

2)Or even more confusing...what if I want to share something wonderful that God is doing in my life. Am I doing it in a positive manner, to shine my light before men so they will praise my father in heaven(Matt. 5:16)? Or am I just like a Pharisee, doing everything for all men to see(Matt 23:5)? Double bleh. That sounds horrid. I certainly don't want to do that.

I really want my heart to be sincere and in the right place. That's all that really matters. But even as I write this, I am shaking my head--everything I am writing sounds "right", but there are still so many times when my heart is in the wrong place. It is as evil as the next: Jeremiah 17:9 "The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure, who can understand it?"

Yes, that very verse was in my bible reading this very day. Ironic.

My funny little niece, Emily, claims "to be the chief of sinners". So is her auntie, unfortunately. Please don't think that I am writing these words here, thinking my heart's motive is pure. Ha, that would be the worst conclusion you could draw from this post.

I am not here to judge the motives of your heart. Many of you have become dear friends. I sincerely love you from the bottom of my heart and I only want what is best for you. I am not pointing any fingers. The only finger I can point is at my own face.

And what is best for me right now is to turn off the comments...

...to write something with absolutely no expectation of hearing anything in return.

...to read my Bible that day and make sure that hearing HIS voice is all that is needed, period.

I will miss hearing your sweet little voices. Any time you took time of out of your day to say something was always greatly appreciated. I still plan to pop by and say hello on your blogs.

I hope to cut down on my computer time though. I can't wait to play outside more with the boys. To read more Bible stories with them. To show them more of the real world.

At the end of lent I will re-evaluate where God wants this little blog of mine to go.

SO next post I write will start the silence.

This is my little way of pulling my blog out of the commotion and into seclusion and quiet for a bit.

p.s. I know that blogging can be very light-hearted and nonsensically fun, in a good way. I have written my share of silly things and I don't plan on being Miss Serious Pants all the time. And there will likely still be little drawings from by boys and sweet little things they do. However, at the same time, I don't want to give the impression that I am only about silly things. God is so important to me and I want you to know that too! I realize I am just a girl and that I have no business being up on some soap box ranting my views. That would be ridiculous. But, I would like to share what God is doing in my life.